A friend of mine invited me to a private poker tournament party in Laguna Hills where there were going to be a bunch of novice players. That, plus the fact that there would be strippers dancing got me to go. After meeting the host, I paid by $100 and sat down at one of the over 10 tables going. The good news was, only one guy at my table knew how to play. The bad news was, only one guy at my table knew how to play. It took forever to play one hand because each player had to be shown how to deal, let alone how to play.
During one hand, the contactor to my right was getting a lap dance from 2 girls, while another girl had her boobs in my face. Between the naked girls and the players not knowing how to play, we were playing about a hand every 10-15 minutes. When a dancer went on the stage, they would dim the lights, making it very hard to see the cards.
In my wildest imagination, I never thought I would say this in my life, but the naked strippers were a distraction and it made it very hard to play cards. Maybe that’s why they don’t have them in the casinos.
Because the players are novices, it’s very hard to bluff them. They will call you down with Ace high thinking it’s good, which it is if you’re bluffing them. So I had to actually wait for a real hand. I finally get pocket rockets (Aces) and raise the minimum. The small blind calls me with A-10 diamonds, and the flop is 4, 5, Jack. I bet out and get called. The turn is an 8. I bet again and the guy goes all-in which is just another 400 for me to call. We turn up our cards and I realize he’s drawing dead and can only chop with a 3, so he’s got 4 outs to tie. I’m sure you can guess what the river was. Yes, a 3 comes on the river and I have to chop the pot. Ugh. At least I didn’t lose, I guess.
Later, a guy goes all in with A-6 off, and the contractor on my right calls him (pre-flop) with pocket rockets. Once again, the board gives 2, 3, 4, 5, and gives both of them a straight, except the A-6 guy gets his 6 high straight and cracks the Aces. Ouch. Glad that didn’t happen to me.
I lasted a little longer but the blinds were going up so high, it became an all-in fest. I had about 20,000 but with the blinds at 2,000 – 4,000, it’s pretty much all-in before the flop. I get knocked out when I go all-in with bottom pair and lose to middle pair.
My friend had to wake up at 7am so we say good-bye to the lovely strippers and drive back to LA. Normally, I would have stayed at the party for some lap dances but I drop off my friend and decide to get some real cash game action at the Hustler.
After having to play against novice players, it was a nice change to play normal at the Hustler. My first hand was 7 3 and decided to raise with it. I get 2 callers and the flop is King high. I bet and one guy check calls me. The turn is another King, and I bet and the guy thinks for a while and folds. Nice. That’s the way things are supposed to be.
On another hand, I have pocket deuces and flop a set. The flop also has a King and the guy with the King bets out. I make a minimum raise and he calls me. On the turn, nothing comes and I bet and he goes all-in. I call and take down a nice pot with my set of deuces. Deuces never looses.
Later, I’m the big blind and the guy to my left raises to $25. There’s 5 callers behind him so I decide to call with 2 3 for pot odds. The flop is King, 2, 2. Nice! There’s already like $150 in the pot so the raiser bets out $150. Everybody folds one by one, to me. Before I can do my Hollywood act, the raiser opens his hand to reveal pocket rockets! I say, “Hey! Hold on,” but it’s too late. Everybody at the table laughs because they think I’m going to fold now.
Now, I do my little Hollywooding and tell the guy, “I’m not trying to mess with you but I have to go all-in.” That’s the cleaned up version of what I said. Suddenly, it gets real quiet at the table as the guy goes into the tank. While he’s thinking, I decide to mess with him a little more by telling him to just fold and I’ll show him my cards. He goes all-in to call me and I show him the bad news. Nothing comes up on the turn or river and I take down a huge pot with my deuce – 3. Nice. This must be my deuces night.
So after my debacle at the private party, I have a great session at the Hustler. But driving home, I had to think about the boobs in the face at the party.